Im back, Im back! Ive actually been back over a week now, but have been revelling in cuddles and building towers and cutting tiny finger foods and changing bums.
I liked Paris a lot. But I LOVED London. The first hour we were there I called Jer and told him to start applying for jobs over there, because come hell or high water, or, a bad economy, we were moving to London.
I loved being yelled at by crackwhores in the tube .
I loved the ads for freaking ‘mayo chickens’ everywhere.
I loved the delicious and good for you fast food places. Yes, really.
I loved the free museums. Free. Museums.
I loved the tube.
I loved the buildings actually built on to one another.
I loved the fashion.
I loved the abundance of men (not that I was looking, obviously).
I loved the lack of snobbery.
I loved the pubs.
I loved the all in one shops.
I loved the history.
OMG I love London.
But I didnt love having to call home to hear Jers voice, and not being able to snuggle up on the couch and watch criminal minds.
I didnt love missing Maddys tooth come in and hearing about her crawling around saying “mum mum mum”.
I didnt love having to press my face into the nightgown I brought from her room to try and find the last spot full of her smell.
I didnt love being away from him, and her.
So I was happy to be home, and to hold Jer’s hand and see his face and hand gestures while he told me stories. And to feel Madelyn’s new little snaggle tooth and see her smile so proud. And to press my nose against her neck, and smell her deliciousness direct from the source.
Ahhhh, I love my life.
And its about to change. I go back to work in less than a week. February 2nd. My heart is hurting at the thought. When I was pregnant there were quite a few women I work with who said “You will miss the adult interaction, I bet you wont be able to wait to get back to work” and I scoffed. As if. I couldn’t wait to spend days playing with my little baby girl. And then three months of colic, followed directly by two months of heavy teething, all on top of post partum depression. I started tring to think of ways to go back to work, and let Jeremy just have her. But, then the clouds parted, and I started to enjoy my long and tiring days. I started to enjoy our routines of nap time, and play time, and destructo-rampage time. And I didnt want to go back to work. I started trying to think of ways to adjust our lifestyle so I could stay home with her until she was school aged.
But its not a reality…
Not with a wedding seven months away.
Not with a $1600 mortgage payment due every month.
Not with the cost of diapers.
Not with my addiction to starbucks.
And certainly not after that little trip to London. Because Im going back, and this time Im bringing her (and Jer) with me. Maybe permenently.
I shall post pictures soon. But right now? Its totally time to build some towers for destructo-rampage time.